Thoughtful ways to offer your condolences and get it right

When someone you know has suffered a family loss, it’s only natural to feel protective of them and to offer your sincerest condolences. Unfortunately, because so many of us are conscious of getting it wrong, we end up saying the wrong thing entirely and our message of sympathy becomes lost in a babble of embarrassment and we wish we could start again.

The best way to show your support during this difficult time is to be as genuine as possible. If you’re searching for the right turn of phrase online or trying to cobble together well-meaning phrases that you can echo when appropriate, then the insincerity of your statements will show. And that’s the last thing you’ll want to happen.

To help you get it right, let’s explore some thoughtful ways you can offer your condolences and how to get it right.

Say it with a condolence gift

Sometimes, actions speak louder than words, and during this difficult period, your friend may find it difficult to express their emotions. They may be angry, reserved, distraught or a mixture of all these and more. While they may be inundated with flowers and cards, gifting them something that can help them feel connected to their loved one, and express their grief and love will always be well received. You’ll find the perfect feather pendant condolence gift here. A unique piece of memorial jewellery, including rings, necklaces, earrings or bracelets that display a significant charm or design can bring solace and comfort whilst their world has suddenly come to a halt.

Always give your condolences in person

Sometimes, modern life can get in the way of what’s important. But when your friend is experiencing a loss, you must express your condolences in person. If you want your sympathies to be seen as genuine and sincere, a text, IM or social media post simply won’t suffice. Take time out of your schedule to meet with them face to face.

Keep your religion to yourself

While your religion might bring you great comfort during times of turmoil, your friend may not feel the same. Of course, you mean well and you only hope to inspire comfort and solace during these early days of grief, however phrases such as “they’re in a better place now,” or “it’s all part of God’s plan”, may not be what they want to hear in the aftermath of a death.

Offer help in other ways

When we lose loved ones, even the simplest of day-to-day tasks suddenly become impossible. This is where you can step in to help. Sharing your condolences is kind, but again, actions speak louder than words. Offer to collect prescriptions for them, run errands, offer childcare or tidy their home while they get some rest – this shows that you’re not only thinking of them during this painful time, but you’re willingly supporting them through it.

And finally, be honest

Sometimes, honesty is the best policy. If you don’t know what to say, tell them. But lace this admission with offerings of help, and support. Just having you around might be all the sympathy and support they need.

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